The Braid Blog

^{Because our stories deserve more than a side part.}

Welcome to the inaugural Read, Rinse, Repeat, an indefinite series of book reviews, where I share summaries containing honest praises and criticisms of the most riveting reads to ever grace my bookshelf. In community with you, we’ll add these books to The Braidshelf, a digital archive of books we’ll discuss on our blog. So, if you’re ever seeking a new world to explore, head over to The Braidshelf in the navigation panel to pick your next read. That being said…

Let’s weave a story, beginning with an author. Let’s call this author Damilare Kuku.

“Awon weyrey! The standard Lagos-Man package comes with lying, cheating, and occasional scamming; alongside stylish kaftans, splashes of Sauvage or Ouds, and fake accents.”

Ch. 4: International Relations, Nearly All The Men in Lagos Are Mad by Damilare Kuku

Though set in Lagos, Nearly All The Men in Lagos Are Mad is so encompassing that it represents the experiences of all women in the dating pool. Each story, separated into twelve enthralling chapters, depicts a male archetype women have and are likely to encounter when meeting men. Not only does each chapter, save the last, convey a humorous edge to the struggles of finding a match, Kuku has properly embodied attributes of love navigation from many perspectives. Told from the viewpoint of young, single babes to that of pastors’ wives to the same of educated career women, these stories have the propensity to enamor readers with cautionary tales from women who think and act just like us. As readers, we’re guided through mentations of decisions to stay, leave, and react to the actions romantic and platonic partners who ultimately prove to be unreliable, unfaithful, and emotionally unavailable.

Told from first and second point of view primarily, these stories allow us to put ourselves into these womens’ shoes and develop emotionally and cognitively as each timeline progresses. There are many feelings to feel, and I felt them all with each continuing line. Kuku’s decision to write a number of the book’s chapters in the second person, an uncommon and difficult writing position, felt to me like a perfectly strategic move towards gripping readers and allowing them to personalize the story as their own. Rivetingly relatable, the fictitious tales transform imagery into reality with every step the characters take. I can’t count the amount of times I had to pause the audiobook momentarily to process some of the things the male characters would propose, nor can I exact the amount of times I was triggered by a familiar experience. I felt that I was in solidarity with women who’d experienced some of what I had, and that I wasn’t crazy in my own reactions to such. In the same vein, I was equally inspired and surprised by the ideas of the characters in their navigation of their various situations.

Of my favorite chapters is the first, titled Cuck Up, which tells the story of a wife and mother called to scrutiny by her husband’s family for holding a knife to his penis. They accost her, expressing disdain for stereotypes she fulfilled in relation to her Igbo heritage and questioning why she would do such a terrible thing to her husband. She begins to share her story, in the second person, of her husband’s uselessness within the household and the events that led to him asking her to sleep with a generous customer who took a liking to her in exhange for money. Another of my favorites is the fourth chapter, The Anointed Wife, which details the actions of a pastor’s wife after his affairs with a much younger woman are made public. Her denial and religious scapegoating are what glued me to her story. I pitied her while simultaneously noting the parallels between her words and that of real-world women placed into her position by their adulterous husbands. She immediately shifts blame to the woman in question and begins a PR war with her that she ultimately loses as the young girl presents irrefutable proof of the affair in the media. With ten other equally captivating chapters, this book is made for women, novice and seasoned, navigating dating and partnership with men of all backgrounds, capable of all kinds of infidelities.

I highly recommend this read to the Braid Babes of the BB. If you’re searching for a humorous read with a romantic and relatable edge, this book is perfect for you! In the meantime follow Damilare Kuku on Instagram to keep up with this acclaimed author. Comment below if you plan to read or your thoughts on this title if you’ve already consumed these stories.

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